Thursday, July 16, 2009

16 and Pregnant

So there is a show on MTV that I've been watching for a few weeks now. It's pretty self explanatory by the title, 16 and Pregnant. It's about teenagers facing the hardships of pregnancy and being a young mom. I am a young mom, but I don't feel like one. I got pregnant at 19, no, it wasn't planned. As a matter of fact, I was religiously taking birth control pills for almost three years when I got my bfp. True, I was scared to death and knew it wouldnt be easy but the girls on this show make me angry. There are some girls who act like having a baby is a joke, like these kids are a toy they can play with and dress up. All of them say "I never imagined having a baby would change my life so much"...ummm yeah, it doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure that one out.
One of the girls tried to live her life like she would if she was still baby-less. She was trying to go on dates and have her mom watch the baby. And they all complain about being exhausted and they want their families take care of their kids while they get their sleep and go out with friends. I understand the exahustion, and I was trully blessed to many helping hands but never for one second did I forget that Gabriel is my son and I have to to be the one to take care of him, change his diapers, give him a bath or anything else.
I went off on a tangent, but what I'm trying to get at is how this show made me feel sorry for some girls while I felt like slapping some other ones. I feel like the idea of being a mom is misconstrued for being easy, teens need to realize how hard it really is to be a mom. Im not one for abortion, so Im not advocating that, what I'm trying to get at is that they should think before they have sex and be very carefull. I dont regret having my son, in fact, I would like another kiddo but I am in a stable relationship and able to provide for my children whereas these young moms have to be depending on others because some of them are not even out of high school or old enough to have a job.
It's not cheap to have a baby, while you can get alot of clothes and essentials at your baby shower, you still have to buy things later on. While breastfeeding is free, you don't see many teen moms doing it or even trying so they end up formula feeding. Even though you can recieve formula through the WIC program, you will have to end up paying out of pocket for the formula that LO drinks once the vouchers are gone for the month, and if the baby needs a special type of formula not covered by the WIC program they have to pay that too. And later on in life, you want to be able to provide for them so they can go to school and hopefully continue on to college.
I guess what I'm getting at is that kids need to not just live in the moment and hope that they can be the "lucky" ones to not get pregnant. And while these tv shows show how hard it is to have your whole life turned upside down once you get a BFP, it seems like they dont send a clear enough message to the kids. I know it is possible to have a child at a young age, even younger than me, and still be a good parent but it's not an easy road to take at all. I love being a mom, but then again I was never the type of girl to spend the weekends at parties trashed and so drunk that I could barely even walk. I was never the type of girl to sleep around with all the guys I dated, which really weren't many. I feel that my maturity level is that of a 26 year old, people even mistake me for being older than I really am. If parenting is tough on a married couple who can provide for their child and have already had many life experiences, what can be expected from teen parents? It's scary to think that kids are "growing" up so quick, that kids are having kids and not enjoying thier lives. Maybe youth is just corrupted now, but I dont remember very many pregnant girls in middle school back in my day.


  1. Oh my gosh I thought I was the only one who watched that show. I couldn't agree with you more. You hit the nail right on the head! I get so mad with those girls. They are always complaining about how hard it is and how they can't live their lives like they used to. Like you said you religiously took birth control and sometimes it still just happens. But none of these girls said they were using birth control in a very effective way and then thought their lives were going to stay the same after having a baby? And the breastfeeding thing really gets me-a couple of them complained about formula costs yet were adamant about not wanting to breastfeed in fear of "ruining" their boobs. Breastfeeding is free! I don't remember too many girls in school pregnant when I was in school either. yes I might be almost 25 now and I had Alex at 23-but I was married at 20 and some people consider that young and having a baby at 23 young. But I was like you-I never was the one partying all weekend and sleeping with all the guys. I do feel bad for these girls. The one that made me bawl my eyes out was the adoption one. My heart went out to those two. You could tell they were really doing it for the better future of their daughter instead of raising her in the household they lived in. I cried and cried that whole episode!

  2. Yes that was my only exception to my whole vent, she was selfless in wanting a better future for her daughter and gave her a better life by giving her up. I feel like the show kind of glorifies teen pregnancy a bit and shows them "hey its hard but just do it, its not so bad"
    makes me batty