Wednesday, December 16, 2009

Forgive me for I have sinned

Ok, so maybe "sinned" isn't the word I should be using but lately I just haven't been blogging much. It's not that I don't have time, I just don't use it wisely. Between laundry, making my Christmas cards, Christmas shopping, chasing after Gabriel, working, watching TV, wasting my time on Facebook I just haven't sat down to catch up on either of my two blogs. Gabriel's Dear Daddy Blog is so behind, like a week and a half or so! I am a horrible wife, I set up that blog so my husband could check in on what Gabriel is up to on a daily basis and although I would ocassionaly miss a day, I would make up for it the next day. Now I can't seem to catch up! I should take advantage of my insomnia that I have been having lately and blog, instead of just tossing and turning for hours or doing nothing. I guess this is a step, me updating this blog. But still...I need to get caught up and fast!
It's not that I don't want to blog, I just end up doing something else, reading other peoples blogs instead of focusing, and when ever Gabriel sees me with the laptop he insists on me playing Mickey's Clubhouse songs on YouTube until I've pretty much had enough of listening to the "Hot Dog Dance" song fifteen times in a row that I put the computer away before I pull my hair out.
As far as updates:
Gabriel is running, climbing, "talking" (he says a few words, everything else sounds like Chinese) and is now off the boob. I thought weaning would be harder but I think we were both just ready. He was refusing whole milk in his sippy (he would drink about an ounce, if that) , so dumb me gave him a bottle. The kid who NEVER wanted a bottle is now all for his "ba-ba". He doesn't walk around with the bottle 24/7 nor does he get milk whenever he wants, strictly for before naps, and night time. He's still not sleeping through the night, I'm thinking CIO might have to be our only option. He does, however, go down for bed (and naps too) easily so I am very thankful for that. We have him on a pretty set schedule and I am also thankful for that since it makes life a little less crazy when we know when to expect a nap and bedtime. I think he grew a ton this past month, we'll have to see at his 15 month appointment where he is on the charts.
The little man is very into anything that has to do with Christmas. He especially loves nutcrackers, or "nuh-caa-caas" as he calls them. I was terrified to death that I would have to be dealing with him trying to grab every decoration, throwing the ornaments thinking that they were balls, ripping the presents, and knocking over the tree.
I am happy to report that the tree still stands, and looks exactly as it did the first day with set it up. He loves looking at the tree and the decorations but he understands that it's a no touch zone.We also went and saw Santa and he loved him.
I was quiet relived to know that my kid wasn't the one screaming bloody murder as we placed him on Santa's lap. He was actually smiling and was happy, and ran over to Santa. I think he was eager to tell him what he would like this Christmas, here he is telling him that he wants Daddy to come home soon.
Thankfully, I am DONE with Christmas shopping, I might have gone overboard this year with presents for Gabriel (and my sister!) but Christmas is my favorite holiday and I am the type of person who loves to give gifts. I am very excited to see everyone's reactions to the gifts I bought for them, especially Gabriel's reaction when he tears the wrapping paper and finds some new toys, I mean, it's not like he has enough toys as it is for crying out loud! While this Christmas will not be the best one, since my husband won't be with us, I tried to make it a good one for everyone. Last week we sent out the husband's Christmas package and I cant wait for him to open it, I'm sure he will love what we got him (I wish I could say what we got but I'm sure knowing my luck, he will snoop around on this page and discover what I got for him and it will ruin his Christmas surprise) so I will post what I got for him after Christmas Day.
I am doing good, still working a ton, getting annoyed at the job but I am thankful that I have a job and that despite the fact that it isn't my dream job I am making decent money and we have food to eat and a place to sleep. Life at home...it's stressful at times. The family gets on my case about things and there are days when I feel like I just can't take it. I wish I could just leave sometimes and get our own place now but I can't just do that. Don't get me wrong, I love my mom to death but I don't love the nagging and comments that make me feel like a shitty mother or daughter, by this point, all I can say is that I know that me moving out will have an awesome impact on our relationship because we won't be butting heads every five seconds.
My sleeping habits suck, I feel so tired but just can't fall asleep. I really do not want to use sleeping pills, I have had to in the past and I quite honestly HATE them with a passion. Last night I was up until 3:15 and I had to wake up at 8. By ten I am ready for a nap but seldom am I able to nap. There is always something to do so I try to put off my nap in hopes that I will be tired enough for bed at 9. Never happens. I need to find something to make me fall asleep or just push myself to go to bed at an earlier time because going off three to four hours of sleep is ridiculous!
On a happier note, this deployment might be over earlier than expected! We got news of a possible March homecoming! I am very excited, to say the least, but I don't want to get my hopes up. I need to get back on my diet and exercise routine so I can look somewhat decent when my husband gets home. When I got sick about a month ago, I stopped exercising and then stopped eating healthy.
Tomorrow will be the day, I need to start getting back into the swing of things. That includes blogging (at least on the Dear Daddy blog) every day so I don't' fall behind again, eating and exercising better and going to sleep at a decent time. I'm sure I'm reaching for the stars here, considering how much of a slacker-insomniac I have become but I need my will power to kick in again!

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